6 Things Every Woman Should Do Before she Gets Married

Marriage is about as big as milestones come. This is your partner! For life! And as such, there are some fundamental life moves you should try to accomplish before you walk down the aisle, just to be sure that you’re entering into your marriage as responsible and self-aware as you can be.

Go on a Blind Date

It’s just one of those things every woman should do at least once.

Figure Out What Turns You On

Need some help IDing your hot spots? Play around with a vibrator, or watch porn, or both—you’ll quickly realize what does it for you simply by trial and error. Also, experiment with different types of sexual partners until you’re able to tell what you like best. And be sure to tell your guy what it is that you want. Just be straightforward and say it: “I like it when you do ___ like ____.” He’ll appreciate the fact that you’re direct; guys aren’t mind readers.

Create a Life That You Love *Without* a Partner

That way, when he shows up, you’re already grounded. You’re not dependent on him, and you’ll be more likely to find someone who loves you and your passions.

Create a List of Five Values It’s Important Your Partner Has

Say, for example, that finding a partner who follows a sustainable lifestyle is absolutely crucial for you. Put that on the list as a reminder not to compromise on your core values. Disclaimer: If you feel that your priorities are shifting and that what you thought was a dealbreaker value isn’t really a dealbreaker value anymore, then by all means, change your list. It’s not set in stone. But if the guy you’re heading down the aisle with right now doesn’t meet one of the criteria on your list—and you still feel it’s important—then it may be time to re-evaluate your relationship before you make a big mistake

Learn How to Be Alone without Being Lonely

Need some help? Try taking yourself to dinner once a week or planning one night a week just for you. You’ll find that whatever you choose to do in those moments is what you really want to do. And knowing how to “find your chill” is crucial because it means that you don’t need outside validation to feel whole—and you don’t put unfair expectations on your partner to keep you entertained. In turn, you’ll likely encourage your partner to pursue his hobbies, too, which will create a healthy interdependent relationship. It’s better to rely on each other completely equally than to have one person do the heavy lifting, which will likely cause tension down the line.

Talk to Your Fiancé (a Lot!) About Your Shared Future

In your ideal world, would you both be working? Where would you live? Would you have children? These are all important things to know before you go into a lifelong partnership—not after.